it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
