You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
