I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Randomize
