And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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