so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
