a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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