if you like me you must not know who I am
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
