I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
