Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
