At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
