It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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