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I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
