Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
