I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
