Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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