Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize