Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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