Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
