If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Randomize
