I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
