38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
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