I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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