I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
