Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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