I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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