Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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