You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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