i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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