So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Randomize
