I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I cut my penus on the lid.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
