She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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