I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
