doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Randomize
