I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
