Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
