His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
