What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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