bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
