Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
