They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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