Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
