You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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