How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
