During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
