Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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