butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
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