im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Terrible idea I love it
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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