His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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