I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
