I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
