You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize